


it started with a kiss

by cineraceuss



Series: The Tale of First Love [1]
Category: Fine Line - Harry Styles (Album), Louis Tomlinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Fluff and Angst, Kissing, Larry Stylinson Is Real, Light Angst, M/M, Making Out, Mutual Pining, Pining, Slow Burn, Teenage One Direction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:22:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24115705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cineraceuss/pseuds/cineraceuss
Summary: the bathrooms was an unexpected place to meet the love of your life, but Harry couldn't complain. he loved Louis to bits, even if it was going to lead to a life of pining. it was worth it to see him smile, those pretty blue eyes hiding in the crinkled sockets of his eyesor: the one where they are both madly in love, but too afraid to admit it. things build up to the point where they can't hide their feelings anymorethis is part of a series but it can be read as a separate work
Relationships: Harry Styles & Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Series: The Tale of First Love [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1746904
Kudos: 18





	it started with a kiss

he thought he couldn't be more obvious, and people seemed to agree with him. every song was about him. how could it now? he was probably the love of his life, even though that was a bit dramatic to say. after all, wasn't he a drama queen?

if things would've been different, Harry would've dared to even call him his soulmate. it sounded nice, in theory, and he was convinced he would've used that term if you asked him three, maybe four years ago. not now. soulmates were supposed to be two pieces of one heart, "two hearts in one home" as he once said. and Louis clearly didn't think of him as his other half.

it hurt, but what could he do? he couldn't force Louis to be in a relationship, he couldn't force him to love Harry. he could cry about it, though, which he did. maybe a little bit too much.

when they met in 2010, Harry would've never imagined that skinny blue-eyed boy from the bathrooms with a stupid accent would turn his world upside down. it honestly wasn't his fault, but how could he not fall for him? how could he do that, it was impossible. he was more disappointed to admit he didn't even try. he was 16, Harry knew nothing about love and relationships and stuff like that. he was just a kid, nobody warned him.

he thought he would hate him at first because Louis seemed to hate everybody. it wasn't in like an over the top manner, not at all. at first, he completely ignored everybody which was odd, but his attitude shifted as they got to know each other better. he just couldn't seem to contain himself when the chance to mock someone arose. Louis was mean to everyone and he soon realized he didn't hate them, that was just his way of being, which was fine because people loved his light banter. Harry also realized that Louis was usually nicer to him than to anybody else, which made questions bubble up in his head all day long.

did he actually hate him and that's how he expressed it? did he see Harry as a stupid child and decided to ignore him completely?

he couldn't know.

during the show, Louis used to help him a lot, which was also bizarre considering his personality, but he let it slide. be it as it was, Harry basked in the attention. despite the fact that the older was annoying him almost constantly, he couldn't help but crave his presence. he was mesmerizing from any point of view. he didn't speak much at first, which only made Harry more eager to win his attention. when the show was over, it already became a strange addiction.

he could've wasted so much time for nothing, but it turned out not to be the case. when they were offered the option to live in separate apartments which were part of the same complex, Harry searched for Louis' eyes as soon as the manager stopped talking. he was scared and desperate, to be honest. he had never lived alone and just thinking about it made his skin crawl. he wasnt a coward, but he preferred not to, if he had the option. while the other boys agreed loudly and celebrated, the two couldn't tear their gazes apart. he tried to plead through his eyes because he was too proud to do it otherwise. apparently, the message got through. Louis cleared his throat the next second and said "umm, is there any way Harry and I could get a shared apartment?"

everything stopped for a second. the cheerful guys looked at them in disbelief and their manager took some time to process their words. Harry looked around him, eyes jumping from one person to another, anxiety rising in his throat. was it really so weird?

"it's just that... Harry is just 16 and since I'm the oldest I think I should... take care of him?" Louis tried to explain, but his words came out unsure, like he didn't even know why he asked in the first place.

another beat of silence. "yeah, sure, that's okay" the man agreed, pulling out his phone "fewer bills to pay," he muttered under his breath, although probably everybody heard him.

so they lived together and it was... nice. more than that, really. he woke up every day to Louis waiting for him in the kitchen, cigarette between his lips and a cup of coffee in his hands. the first time he saw him smoke, he screeched so hard Liam could hear him from two floors above. Louis just huffed and ignored him.

"that's going to kill you!" he whined, voice breaking at the end and eyes wide. fucking puberty

Louis chuckled again "in small doses, it's not" he dismissed him.

and that was the end of it. as time passed Harry found he started to look forward to the moment he would reach for his back pocket and pull out a cigarette with his teeth. after that, his train of thoughts was lost. he loved to watch him do it, strings of smoke coming out in small puffs, rising around his face like a dreamy cloud.

"let me try one," he asked one time at the kitchen table. his legs were pressed against his chest, chin perched on one of his knees, left hand hugging his feet as the right one cradled his teacup.

Louis' eyes snapped up from his phone and he looked at him incredulously. he lifted the hand that was holding the cigarette up as if to make a point. "what, this?!" he asked then

he gave back a small nod. somewhere in the back of his head, he knew he looked like a puppy. it was something he did when he wanted a favor from Louis. it usually worked, so Harry started to do it unconsciously.

he let out a puff in disbelief, smoke following his breath "didn't you say they would kill me?" Louis mocked him.

"didn't you say they wouldn't in small doses?" Harry parroted, head leaning from a side to the other, brows furrowing as he let his feet drop to the cold tile.

"Harry, you are too young to start smoking" he explained slowly, but the younger was already getting up "hell, even I am too young to do it!"

Harry gave him a hard look and extended his hand despite everything he said. Louis didn't budge, so he rose an eyebrow at him. he held his composure for a few more seconds, but dropped his head quickly

"oh, c'mon, Lou, please!" Harry said "I wanna understand why you do it"

Louis caved. as he was passing the cigarette to Harry, he realized that was often the case when it came to the younger. damn, he was getting soft... we wondered why for a second. he was his usual mean self around everybody else, but when Harry smiled at him, green eyes crinkling at the sides, dimple showing and curls bouncing around his face, he could do nothing, but exactly what he asked for. it was unsettling and Louis decided he needed to find the answer fast. he couldn't give him special treatment just because he was pretty.

somewhere in the back of his head he realized it was about more than beauty, but he dismissed that thought.

his string of thoughts cut as he watched Harry place his lips on the cigarette and gently suck, anxiety written in his gaze. he inhaled deeply, breathing out after a bit. as he watched the smoke coming out of the other's plush pink lips, Louis found his answer.

'that was quick' he thought to himself as it processed. he was crushing on Harry. then it hit him

_he was crushing on Harry._

he felt panic bubbling in his stomach, choking him up. before he could start to ramble like a manic, Harry started to cough, clutching at his throat.

he got up, too, gently patting him on the back as the younger almost puked his breakfast. he handed the cigarette back to him as he wheezed

"yep, I don't get it! never doing that again" Harry confessed as he crashed back into his chair.

Louis laughed so hard he had to hold his stomach, wheezing because of the lack of air. such a posh kid...

he looked at Harry, leaning against the wooden table, a giant grin still on his face. his muscles hurt from so much laughing and smiling, but he couldn't help it. clearly not when the boy looked down to avert his gaze but his lips tugged up, sketching a smirk.

he was so fucked

***

it was a free day, which was unusual and while the boys decided to sleep in, Louis chose to take Harry for a walk. despite how tired he was, the younger agreed to it anyways. Harry then thought he would follow Louis to the end of the fucking world and beyond if that's what it took to spend time with him. it was chilly outside and the world took on a grey hue. they were both snuggling into their coats, Louis walking in front, leading the way.

Harry didn't mind. if he stayed behind, the older couldn't see him staring at him, watching his every move. it was a nice view. suddenly, Louis stopped in his tracks and turned his head around to look at him. Harry stopped, too. what was he supposed to do when Louis looked at him with those piercing blue eyes? they didn't say anything, and the stretch of silence allowed him time to drown into his depths of ocean.

"I- I wanted to go to that park outside the apartment residence. is that fine with you?" he asked, always so thoughtful around him. he couldn't wrap his head around it sometimes. he saw Louis punch Niall in the stomach purely because he thought he was annoying, yet when it came to him he was so... understanding and calm.

"sure" he agreed, a bit lost inside his mind. it was crazy what Louis did to him, and a little bit worrying. he had never felt that way before, like he couldn't get him off his mind. he hadn't even known him for that long, but he felt lost when Louis wasn't there with him.

the park was quiet and void of any other human. it rained earlier that day, he heard it tapping against his window when he woke up, the sound following him into the living room where Louis was watching footie on telly. he sometimes wondered when they got so... domestic. he wasn't about to complain.

the swings were still a bit damp when they arrived at the park, so Louis pulled on his jacket's sleeve and whipped the water away.

"what a gentleman" Harry chirped, but he was in fact impressed with the gesture

Louis stopped for a second and looked at him with a serious face "I'm going to shove this hand down your throat, see how much of a gentleman I am then" he threatened, but he knew it was in vain. Harry gave him a dimpled smile and sat down on the swing, ignoring Louis's words completely. the older soon joined him and they started to rock back and forth in silence for a while.

"what do you think about the new track I showed you?" Louis asked. if Harry didn't know any better he would say he sensed a lack of... confidence, reassurance. huh, so Louis felt anxiety, too. so much for an ice queen.

he took his time to think of the words before saying them out loud, which was generally unusual for his hot-headed self. but Louis asked for his opinion, he wanted to know what Harry though. it was important "I liked the lyrics a lot, I wish I could compose like that. the track's a bit too bubbly. it distracts the listener from the overall message"

Harry looked to the side to see his reaction, but the man kept his hands buried in his pockets, blue eyes cast down like he wanted to create a hole in the ground with only his gaze. Louis gave a curt nod, but his expression didn't change. if he wanted praise, Harry could give him that, too, but he asked for his thoughts.

"you do, though," Louis argued. Harry pinched his eyebrows and looked at him. what was that supposed to mean? "you do write like that, I mean. and before you start to give me an earful, you're still young. your songs are already crazy good and you'll just progress from here. by the time you reach my age, you'll be like a tiny Bach"

see, that's what made life complicated: Louis showing him affection and showering him with praise. Harry wished the older hated him sometimes, it would've been easier not to feel those things. that tingly emotion that rose in his throat every time he caught him staring. he felt _that_ before, he wasn't a fucking looser, but never at that level. it was fucking scary. and there was no way Louis felt the same, no way.

Louis considered Harry was a special type of human. nobody could be that perfect, but he was. which was questionable. he had to remind himself he was just a kid sometimes, when Harry slipped and let out how smart he actually was (Louis couldn't figure out exactly why he tried to hide it in the first place) or when he brushed his hair away from his face and his green eyes sparkled with passion. it was a dangerous game to play: dancing around each other, pretending they were just friends.

their relationship shifted, it became different than the ones they had with the other members and it happened on that blessed day when Harry pleaded him to speak up with only his eyes. probably a lot of people were aware of the change, but none was brave enough to point it out. he asked to live together, such an intimate thing, and Louis agreed without a second thought.

he felt weak at first. he let Harry control his actions and he was stuck with his loud and annoying arse instead of chilling in an empty apartment. but as they rolled their suitcases inside their new home and Harry smiled at him, teeth out and lips turning thin, he couldn't find it in himself to regret it.

he thanked God for every moment he got to spend in his presence, but he could never let him know _that_.

Harry got up from his swing and placed himself in front of Louis

"raise your legs," he asked in a demanding tone. Louis looked at him as if he was crazy. 

remember when Louis said Harry was smart? scratch that. what the hell was going on into that peanut brain of his?

"what? no!"

Harry pressed his lips in a straight line and gave him an accusing gaze "come on, Lou! it's gonna be fun" he whined as he bent down to grab him by the ankles himself.

Louis let out a yelp as the younger pulled him forward, hands immediately coming out of his pockets to grab at the chains holding the swing up. Harry moved backward, taking Louis' whole body with him and when he decided the distance was good enough, he let go. Louis powerfully rocked back and forth, the wind ruffling his hair as he struggled not to wheeze. he shifted his center of gravity towards his behind, swinging forward with as much speed as he could and he let go of the chains, body plunging into the hair. he kicked with a foot at Harry's shoulder, who remained in front of him. Louis landed on the cold ground as the other stumbled backward, fortunately not falling on his arse.

good, that was good, Louis thought. it wasn't supposed to push him down, it was just supposed to distract his attention so that he _could fucking kill him._

"Harry fucking Styles," he growled at him, but Harry just chuckled.

"yes, honey?" Harry teased, regaining his balance. he was fully prepared to dodge a punch, but it never came. he made sure to never wipe his grin away, but as he looked at Louis, blue eyes glinting despite the lack of light and lips sketching a smile, it was hard to contain himself.

how could he look so beautiful when he was planing a murder?

a thunder rumbled in the distance, shattering the sheltered atmosphere that created around them. Louis was the first one to break the eye contact, looking somewhere in the distance at the storm clouds gathering. lighting crossed the sky in a rush, casting its white shine across the older's face, reflecting against his cheekbones. 

"let's go back inside, Harry," he said after a while, hands back inside his pockets and smile whipped completely from his face. Harry gulped against the lump in his throat and followed his proposition. halfway to their apartment complex, rain started to pour down on them, slowly at first. the small droplets of water kicking against the pavement soon turned into a full on storm. he looked at Louis, panic written across his face. it was clearly not the time to catch a cold.

Louis looked back at him and they made a silent agreement, nodding at one another as they dashed for their block. both of them sprinted as fast as they could, Harry quickly moving past the other. he turned his head to look at Louis, struggling to keep up with a tight lipped smile across his face and hands flying chaotically around him.

"you dickhead, wait up!" he shouted through gritted teeth.

Harry couldn't help but laugh. he found himself being generally too amused by the other's sassy attitude. "then run faster, tiny grandpa" he teased and oh, he was going to get kicked for that.

they finally made it inside the entrance lobby, and the bodyguard looked at them confused from his desk. Harry ignored him as he slumped against the wall, grin still plastered on his face. Louis was leaning forward, palms on his knees, breath ragged from their crazy dash. he rose his eyes and watched the younger's smiling face. 

"what are you smirking at?" he tried to threaten, but his heavy breaths took away from his edginess "I'm going to fucking kill you, Haz"

and so he stopped laughing " _Haz_?" Harry repeated, confusion etched on his face. since when was Louis using nicknames for anybody? he didn't dare look down, so he kept his eyes forward and tried to look unbothered, when inside he was fucking burning.

Louis popped into his field of vision as he moved past him and towards the elevator. he saw his face at the corner of his eyes and was that...? it couldn't be. but Harry got to know him well enough during X Factor and the days they spent after as band mates. Louis was embarrassed, lower lip caught between his teeth as he was fumbling with it. he wanted to look again, just to make sure, but the older was already in front of the metal doors and the back of his head covered by soft brown hair was no proof, even though he enjoyed the view. he walked until he was next to him and they stepped inside the elevator together. 

Louis was acting weird that day, showing emotions Harry never saw on his face before. if not for his constant gaping at him, Harry wouldn't have been able to read him.

as they ascended the floors, a small bing was heard every few seconds. he willed himself to glance down at Louis. every moment spent looking at his beautiful face was a gift, but this time he actually had something to look for. water was dripping from his bangs, latching onto his long lashes, sticking his hair to his forehead. they were both drenched and every time Harry took a step, rain splotched around in his shoes. he knew how he looked then: a fucking mess, curls frizzy and falling wildly around his face because of the wind. it was no pretty sight. they got out of the elevator and they made their way in silence towards their apartment. the air felt heavy, filled with unspoken words, although it seemed like it was nothing to talk about.

Louis already had his set of keys out, shuffling through them to find the right one. he froze in his spot, finally ( _finally_ ) looking up at him, gracing Harry with the most beautiful sight ever.

"did you hate it when I called you Haz?" he asked. he looked vulnerable, like his walls were down and he presented himself to Harry as he was.

he realized he gaped at him in silence for a little bit too long "no, not at all. I quite liked it, actually" Harry managed to say.

he gave a curt nod and opened the door, entering their little home. Harry followed (as he always did), toeing his shoes off as Louis disappeared inside the kitchen

"besides," he shouted after him "considering you didn't kill me when I called you honey, you can use whatever nickname you want"

Harry crashed into his seat, watching as Louis put the kettle on the stove and turned around to face him. "first degree murder needs a carefully crafted plan so the killer can walk away" the older told him, no sign of amusement in his tone. he would've actually been scared if he hadn't seen him in one of Harry's fluffy brown sweaters, folded on the couch with a runny nose and a cuppa cradled in his hands. Louis could be so fucking tiny and adorable when he wanted to. it was a weapon he didn't use often, but when he did...

***

"should I cook something for tonight?" Harry asked. he just got out of his bedroom after an intense sessions of composing that almost ended with him bawling his eyes out on the floor. he was leaning against the door, arms crossed over his chest.

Louis shuffled in his seat on the couch, looking at him.

"if you feel up to it," he shrugged, placing his eyes back on his phone "we can order take-out if you don't wanna"

"yeah, I'll make something" Harry concluded, getting up to start doing his job "I'm in the kitchen if you need me" he added

around 15 minutes passed and he had all his ingredients spread out in front of him. he was aiming for some basic pasta his mom thought him how to make. before Harry could actually start mixing stuff, the doorbell rang. the sound was soon followed by an obnoxiously loud grunt Louis let out from the living room.

"I'll get it" he shouted out, chuckling at him through the open door. Louis was sitting upside down, phone still stuck to his hands and head dangling over the side of the couch "you big baby" he then muttered.

he swung the door open, smile still on his face, but soon dissolving as he saw who stood in front of the door. her long hair fell over her tiny shoulder gracefully. long legs and tiny waist, all part of the person he knew as "Eleanor..."

he hated her. he despised her, was repelled by her, every word in the book. while it was mostly a stupid thing built on jealousy, she wasn't the nicest to Harry either. she looked as displease to see him as Harry did.

"hi, Harry" she greeted through her teeth "I'm here to talk to Louis. can you tell him I came?" she asked, using that honey-coated voice of hers that was actually hiding so much venom.

"sure, just a moment" he retorted with an equally fake smile. 

he popped his head inside the living room 

"mate, Eleanor is here" Harry told him and Louis seemed as shocked as he did. that was at least a bit grounding. it meant he didn't invite her over. she was still there, nonetheless and Harry decided she wanted her out of _their_ house as soon as possible. when Louis passed him in the doorway, he placed a hand on his shoulder and gave him a forced smile.

"I'll be on the balcony, give you guys some privacy" he told him, trying to be a good fucking friend.

he moved around quickly, not wanting to hear anything they talked about, envy and another ugly feeling tumbling around in his stomach. it wasn't good at all. he grabbed a blanket from the armchair and Louis' pack of cigarettes he left on the coffee table. once outside, he wrapped the warm cloth around him. it smelled like their scents combined. it was embarrassing to admit, but the fragrance of them together was way more calming than it should've been. 

he didn't bring a lighter with him because he didn't really intend to smoke. he wanted to keep his hands busy for a while and also feel closer to Louis. he fumbled with the paper lid, opening and closing it, twisting the cigarettes in their places. he looked out at the dark sky and the realization that he clearly didn't have enough layers for a winter night suddenly hit him. someone a few floors above them was playing some music on the speakers, the singer's voice being the only sound that could be heard. it was a little bit muffled because of the wind, but Harry enjoyed the sweet melody anyways. 

Christmas season was approaching and with it their departure from London. Harry was so excited to go back to his family, he missed them like hell. Gemma said she was excited to hear more about Louis in person. apparently he talked about him a lot, sue him. he also missed his mother's warm embrace that always made him feel safe. he really needed it in that moment, too.

it was stupid, that was Louis' ex. and even if she was his girlfriend, it was none of his fucking business, they were _just friends_. he had no right to be jealous about it. then why did he want to close his eyes to sleep for at least 5 months? his limbs seemed out of service, heavy when he tried to get them to work. suddenly the darkness behind his lids seemed really inviting. 

he started to hum along to the tone in the background, eyes jumping from a star to another. he didn't feel like going home if that meant being separated from Louis. oh God, he was so in love.

Harry's eyes flew open. he stiffened in his chair, back going straight as he leaned forward. his hands gripped the arms of the chair, his knuckles turned white and the plastic trembled under his force. suddenly, sleep was the furthest thing from his mind.

he was in love.

which was completely fine because people fell in love all the time and there was nothing wrong with liking the same gender. there really wasn't and he knew it with every fiber of his being. he just wasn't expecting to fall in love with Louis of all people. who was probably straight, by the way, proof being the gorgeous woman in their apartment. panic bubbled up in his chest and he looked up. he read somewhere that if you look up you can hold your tears better, which proved not to be the case as soon as two twin droplets crossed his cheeks. he was in deep shit.

the door of their balcony opened and Louis let himself inside. Harry quickly whipped the tears away and he focused his gaze on the other man. he crashed into the chair next to his, hands going into the pocket of his thick winter coat to retrieve a lighter. the younger offered him his pack without a word. Louis silently thanked him as he puffed out his first drag of smoke into the winter air.

"so" Harry whispered for the sake of breaking the ice "how'd it go?" he asked, even though he was almost sure he didn't want to know.

Louis didn't say anything for a while as his free hand moved against the cold metal ledge

"she wanted to get back together" he finally confessed

Harry struggled to open his mouth, to matter a "congratulations" and dash back inside. his eyes stung with the first hint of tears. he looked at Louis, mouth slightly open like a fish's because his body decided to betray him.

the cold disappeared immediately as his heart got smaller and smaller, cutting his breathing. Louis didn't look happy, he didn't look like a guy who just got his model girlfriend back.

"I said I didn't want to be with her," he explained as he placed his cigarette back to his lips. now that he was finally taking him in, the haze in his vision gone, Harry realized he was stressed. his left foot was jittery, bouncing relentlessly as his shoe made a continuous thumping noise against the concrete floor. his fingers from his free hand were almost trembling. what the hell happened? he had been in a slumbered state the last 24 hours and now Louis looked like he wanted to jump out of his skin.

"okay.." Harry said slowly, like talking to a frightened animal. he was on edge and all he wanted to do was hug him, run his fingers through his hair and assure him that everything was just fine. he couldn't do that, so he settled on asking "what's wrong, mate?"

Louis shifted in his seat for a couple of times, before he put out his cigarette. 

"nothing," he lied through his teeth, now with his hands free, he moved them from the arms of the chair to his knees and back up, like he didn't know what to do with himself "nothing, it's fine"

Harry wanted to scream and to pull his hair. Louis seemed sad, but he knew he could do nothing about it, nothing to take the pain away. he placed his thumb under his pointer finger and pushed it against his palm, a trick he learned to ground himself. Harry needed to be strong for him.

"well" he said then stopped to get up from his chair. even though it was almost freezing temperature, the air felt overheated, like their cramped balcony didn't belong to the rest of the world. he needed out. "that pasta I was about to make isn't going to cook itself" before he could slide the door open, a hand caught his wrist.

he looked down at it, then at Louis, who seemed as shocked by his action as Harry, eyes fixed on their touching hands. he didn't let go, so Harry didn't pull.

"I-I was thinking maybe I could cook tonight" Louis said perplexed. before he could open his mouth to question it or to argue or whatever, the other continued " you always cook for both of us, so why don't I give it a try?"

the kitchen light was shit, but Louis glowed hard enough to light the whole room. mere seconds ago, they were both debating jumping from the building, now their smiles looked permanent.

"that is so not how you do it!" Harry complained from his place at the table, but with no real bite to it. his eyes were fixed on the screen of his phone, typing away. their group chat was on fire because he thought it was a good idea to post a picture of Louis cooking on Twitter. he wanted to have some evidence of how their place looked like before the older burned it down.

"shut your fucking mouth" Louis hissed back. he chose a rather hard recipe in Harry's opinion. chicken stuffed with mozarella, wrapped in parmaham with homemade mash. he knew nothing about how to prepare that, but he worked in a bakery for most of his teenage life and he always helped his mom around the house. his cooking skills were good enough to know how food was made. Louis was not doing it right "stop acting like a smart arse, Haz"

he wanted to talk back because that's what he did, but he found himself unable to comment when Louis called him _that_. it turned out not tasting like shit, so there was nothing more to say. Louis pulled a bottle of wine from their cabinet and Harry almost choked on his chicken.

"where the fuck did you get that?" he asked a grinning Louis.

he said nothing as he poured a glass for both of them. Harry took it, rather awestruck. 

"you keep forgetting I'm legally an adult" Louis tsked at him and the younger was surprised to note the lack of his usual sarcasm. 

"maybe because you keep acting like a baby" Harry said, hoping he could have the last word. Louis smiled at him, a geniuen one that crinkled the corners of his pretty eyes. he took a sip and locked their gazes. it was hard to look away, even when Harry drank from his own wine. although he was just 16 then, he could stil tell it was a cheap thing Louis probably acquired from the corner shop, but he couldn't complain. the food, the drink and Louis smiling at him like he shined brighter than all the stars in the world created a romantic atmosphere. he didn't want to let it fuck with his head because he knew his brain was just mesiing with him. despite that, he clung to that tiny thread of hope like a sinking man.

***

Louis never cooked after. Harry sometimes wondered if it ever happened, deeming it the material of his hidden dreams, a monster created by his imagination. 

"I bet my chicken stuffed with mozarella, wrapped in parmaham with homemade mash was better than what you're doing right now," Louis chirped from behind him. Harry didn't even bother to turn around. he kept his head down, a lost curl falling over his forehead.

yeah, he would've wondered if he had gone mad if Louis would _ever_ stop talking about his miracle of a dinner.

"bullocks" Harry whispered under his breath, kind of hoping he would hear him, kind of hoping he wouldn't. 

"what did you say, you dickhead?" Louis asked, but it was hard to take him seriously when he could clearly hear the amusement in his voice.

"nothing, darling" Harry sing-songed. he was walking on a thin line between playfulness and getting kicked in the nuts, even though Louis hadn't actually attacked him in a while. he was like a violent lap dog. he moved the stir-fried vegetables into two plates and brought them on the table. Louis wasted no time to shovel his food in, looking like a squirrel with his cheeks puffed. it was incredible to watch him eating like a starved man all the time when his waist was so tiny and his cheekbones so defined. Harry's love handles could never compete. well, he wasn't one to complain, it wasn't a race after all. 

"you're lucky you feed me 'cause that criminal plan is coming along pretty well" he mumbled with his mouth stuffed. always white threats. Harry just shook his head in amazement. with enough devotion, Louis could become a great murderer, but he chose to be an artist. incredible. 

Harry dropped his fork and rose his left hand, spreading his fingers. "let's see" he started "I cook for you, I do the laundry, I clean around the house and I _always_ help your posh ass when you start to whine like a baby" Harry argued, counting down on his fingers.

Louis put down his utensils, too, making a shocked face, placing a hand over his chest. "I'm posh?" he asked incredulously "you won't get into the bathtub if it doesn't have bubbles or like essential salts or some shit" he attacked.

"how would you even know about my bubbles and salt?" Harry told him, placing one foot on top of the other. he knew their little domestic fight was in vain.

"because you never clean after you! the tub is always painted pink or blue or God knows what color and your stupid hair gets everywhere!" Louis tried to complain, but he was smiling, too. "plus, I once saw you standing on the closed toilet, waiting for your bubbles to form! only fucking kids do that, Harold"

Harry didn't make an attempt to say anything more and settled on just laughing, eyes fixed on him. domestic bliss.

Louis was so caught up into their little argument, hands flying around him, he looked at him bewildered when he heard him laugh. he gazed at him questioningly for a second, but dropped the act immediately. he didn't make the effort to smile, but his pretty blue eyes hid into the sockets of his lids, grinning with his face rather than just his mouth. adorable. 

he didn't realize he filtered out all signs of a world outside of their little bubble, but the music playing on tv slowly replaced the doped buzzing noise in his ears. it was love ballad, all mellow vocals and sweet sound. something must've happened because his brain gave up all control, body moving on its own. he rose from his seat and stepped in front of Louis who looked up at him with wide eyes. he extended his hand, palm up. the older didn't get it at first, but Harry could pinpoint the exact moment when his action processed in his brain.

"is this a dance invitation, Haz?" he asked

Harry didn't say anything, but he was smart enough to figure it out. he then got up, rather unsettled, but Louis grabbed his hand nonetheless, placing the other above his waist. his hold on Harry was fragile, like he could fleet at any moment, hands like a feather touch. Harry let out a huff, honestly to afraid to call him a pussy. he valued his life, thank you very much. he placed his larger hand on Louis' shoulder as they slowly started to rock back and forth on the soft tune. at first, he wasn't sure where to look, but he settled on Louis' face. strong choice, he was fucking beautiful. 

their kitchen was no 5-stars restaurant, but it did the job when they were just the two of them. he found Louis already looking at him. after a few beats of just dancing, Harry wondered if the music was still playing, drowned out by the sound of his own heart beating. they migrated closer, chests pressed together as their feet idly moved. they were so close he felt Louis' breath hitting against his chin and his heart beating against his skin. he thought for a second they synced up, but it was probably his love-sick mind. 

the air around them felt heavy enough to make Harry choke on his inhale, but he deemed air unnecessary when Louis was so fucking close and every harry on his body was rising in excitement.

he can't really tell who leaned in first, but when their lips touched he definitely felt it. a buzz moved throughout his whole body, dissolving into the ground when it reached his toes. it was such a mesmerizing thing that put his every nerve on high alert. the press was gone before he could analyze it more, but he knew it wasn't enough. he opened his (apparently) closed eyes and cast them down on Louis' slightly parted lips, like he couldn't comprehend what happened either. an inviting sight.

the moment before they kissed again was like a drum roll, like his heart decided to cross all laws of nature. then there it was again, like a strike of lighting through his body. he pressed closer, anxious for more touch. his hands circled Louis's narrow shoulders and his mouth moved with more intent. 

all thoughts erased from his mind as it became a tangled thread of ' _Louis, Louis, Louis_ '. he was everywhere, skin pressed against skin, his characteristic scent filling his nose-thrills as his long lashes tickled against Louis' cheek. a dangerous addiction and they had been only kissing for a few minutes. or years, Harry couldn't really tell. time was a tricky concept when he felt as high as a kite on everything that meant the other man. 

he cradled his face into the palms of his hands and he kissed him like he was a fragile doll, like he was a spirit that descended onto Earth and could disappear into thin air at any second. Harry knew this was a special moment, something that could happen once then never again, a fleeting feeling. he needed to appreciate it while it lasted. but then Louis let out this teensy tiny whimper, so soft and quiet he would've missed it if not for their close proximity. he felt it vibrate against his chest and lips as it fell from his mouth.

Harry had to stop for a second. his poor 16 year-old self could not comprehend that amount of love and arousement. a traveler thought passed through his mind, and despite the fact that it left as soon as it came, it was enough for Harry to fully understand it. that was all he was ever going to get. that kiss, that moment, that was it. which was bad because he had never felt so good in his whole life and from that moment on he was cursed to spend the rest of it remembering what he once had, what he could never have again.

he darted his tongue out to lick his lips, chasing the taste of Louis on them. it tasted like cigarettes and fresh rain and something so uniquely his. he didn't dare open his eyes, too afraid of what was to come. he wanted to delay the inevitable, to hold Louis' face a little bit more, to feel like he owned the world a little b-

but then Louis rose on his tiptoes to get a better angle and he kissed him again with so much fervor Harry froze for a beat. he recollected himself, licking against his top lip. he lowered a hand, grabbing Louis' hip, turning them around and slowly pushing him against the kitchen counter. he placed his palms on the top, caging Louis in. the older's hands tangled in his hair, pulling idly at his curls. it was an incredible thing, really and he never knew kissing could feel like that.

he knew there was a big talk coming, but Louis right there in his arms was worth any heavy words. 

he kissed him as his life depended on it, licking into his mouth like a starving man. and Louis made the sweetest sounds, like tiny mewls. they feel against his lips, drowning into their intense kissing. the older was so responding to Harry's every touch, leaning against his hands as they traveled over his body.

they parted from the lack of air more than anything else. in fact, Harry decided he could do this forever if he was offered the occasion. after all, who wouldn't want to kiss Louis Tomlinson for a lifetime? 

he let his head fall against the older's chest, hands back on the counter top and fingers massaging the bits of Louis' hipbones he could reach. Louis kept his hands where they previously where, tangling the fluffy curls around his digits, face cast forward. Harry kept his eyes closed, face pressed against the other's body. 

there was no coming back from this. no way in hell. 

the question was: where did they go from there?


End file.
